Social Construct!! What is it?

Construct

“An idea or theory containing various conceptual elements, typically one considered to be subjective and not based on empirical evidence: history is largely an ideological construct.”

My mind is in the rut for the last 10 days about Social Construct! Within minutes of arriving in another country away from the friendly confines of your home, you start sizing up the environment around you, especially if it is your first time in that country or it is a place that you are unfamiliar with. It is similar to your first date. You are anxious, dying to get to know your date and the possibilities that lie ahead for you with this person. Exploring a new or an unfamiliar country is much the same. Your mind starts to stretch. Your senses (all of them) are challenged. There are things you immediately are attracted to and there are some elements that either make you uncomfortable or just absolutely repulse you. There are plenty of emotions that emanate which can be anywhere in the spectrum between great and awful. Regardless, you leave with more than you came with.

That’s why travel, as timorous as it may be to someone who doesn’t get out often enough, it can also change the minds of the staidest and ensconced in their surroundings. Don’t get me wrong, I have no qualms with those who choose never to leave their comfort zone to explore. My neighbor in Ohio had never driven farther than Sault St. Marie in Michigan which was only a few hours ride from Avon Lake, Ohio and had never even stepped a foot on an airplane. When he died at a relatively young age of 57, he left this big beautiful planet traveling a radius of no more than 300 odd miles. Did that make him less of a human being? Well, it depends on who you ask. If you asked him, he would say no, because he lived a fulfilling life. To him that meant being a good dad, raising 7 kids, running a pharmacy, being kind to anyone he ever met. He left an amazing legacy for his future generations of empathy, charity, loads of love and affection and much more. I miss him to this day. I have had the great fortune of meeting many others in my life who were ordinary people but made a profound positive impact on others. No books were published by them, they didn’t produce complex mathematical formulas, they didn’t run for office or do anything that would make them memorable to more than a few handful of people that crossed paths with them. They did change the world though. In their own small way, good or bad, they changed this world. They gave and they took. By definition that changes our environment.

Every living being on this planet contributes to its change. A cow provides milk to a child. That one cow alone made a difference in the life of that child, even if it was for one afternoon. I hope people stop and see trivial things around them and realize that even a fallen leaf on the road was part our ecosystem and made an impact. It is irrefutable.

Why then, do I ponder all of this? It’s primarily to search for what makes this world run. I am beginning to see that this world is based on some complex physical phenomenon that equates us in ways that are inexplicable to all of us. Epiphany, right? Actually no, I am sure I am not the first to propose this but “deep in my heart, I do believe” (a song we used to sing at our school assembly), that everything balances out in this world. That our life is based on a physical formula that we have not been able to decipher and I hope we never do. Because this needs to remain the greatest mysteries of our lifetime or perhaps the lifetime of this planet. Let that mystery die when this planet turns itself into a black hole.

Just like for every reaction there is an equal and opposite reaction, just like every magnet has opposing forces, just like for every summer there is a winter. Everything in this world is balanced. You may not agree with that balance but unfortunately you have not been given the power to fix it and let’s take a moment to thank the universal forces for that. Humans have made extraordinary advances in every field and we can prolong life, attenuate the pain, the suffering but we are never able to control it. The schedule of people coming and going from this earth is not in our hands. You may think that by murdering or taking another life, you alone determined their fate? Nope, nada, nyet. That was an equation. You were a variable in that equation. End of story.

I could go on with multitudes of examples but I don’t want to turn this blog post into a polemic.

So that bring me back to the question that has been playing on my mind. What social construct should one follow?

Here are a few questions to ponder.

·      What is a social construct?

·      Who created it?

·      What gave this person or a group of people the right to create it?

·      Who manages the changes to this construct as we evolve?

·      Are laws based on Social Constructs?

·      If so, why?

·      What role does religion plays in it?

As we struggle in our own individual way and we all do really struggle. Grappling with challenges in life is universal. Mental, physical, health and other struggles are non-discriminatory. The cross all boundaries. There may be varying degrees of it but the pain and suffering doesn’t discern between the rich and the poor. Social constructs become meaningless and we turn to things that bring us comfort. Opioids, god, faith, people, alcohol, solitude whatever it takes to fix our ailments. You are Steve Jobs one day and the next day, deracinated from your throne of power and reduced to a rubble.

Trust me, this is leading somewhere. Stay with me.

Since this is my blog, I alone get to dictate the ending. It isn’t here to please you or to seek opprobrium. It is merely here to share my thoughts while I fly over the North Pole on my flight. I don’t know, there is something that I like about writing on a flight.

Over my 52 years, I have seen a lot. I have done a lot. Both good and bad. Have not kept track of the metrics and couldn’t produce a bar chart of it if anyone asked me for it. One thing has turned out to be prominent. Being nice in this world to others is far more fulfilling than being mean. Giving a part of you, whether it be physical, emotional, monetary, time, compassion or anything positive, makes you feel far more fulfilled than the opposite. There is a big caveat though and I am going to dumb it down tremendously. Give, but please don’t expect the behavior of the other person, pet, plant, tree, to change because of it. The second you put any expectation on it, you are breaking an equation. That equation will work itself out and you need to trust that the unknown universal force will work.

Please try it. The world is in desperate need for compassion. You need not look past Ghouta, Syria unless you were too busy counting likes of your post on FB of a selfie you took while eating that incredible Tiramisu at Gary Danko.

Thank You Dodger

Dear Dodger,

They say that all dogs go to heaven. There was even a movie made on it. I didn’t get to watch it. You see I am only 11 weeks old and I don’t know a lot about the world yet. I do feel your presence though and I wanted to write this note to thank you. I know you will wonder why but let me explain. 

I was born on November 18th, 2017 in Terrell, TX. It’s about 32 miles from Dallas, TX. I belong to a large family of Labradors and Poodle’s. My mom’s name is Paris Parker and my dad is a Labrador named Chip. I am a labradoodle. Brown and White. I have heard that my eyes have depth. I don’t know anything about that but my mom and dad’s owners raise puppies and sell them online. This is where my story begins. 

One fine day while I was running around the farm in Terrell with my siblings when I heard Kathy our breeder call out my name. She sounded excited and told me that I was going to California. I had no idea what that was or where it was. After a few days of trips to the vet, some shots and paperwork, the next thing I knew, I was being driven to Dallas Fort Worth for a trip to California. 

My ride was short but cramped. I was in a small crate and when I arrived at the airport, there were a ton of strange people putting tags and stickers on my crate. It was all very confusing to me. Scary even. Here I was playing in a large farm one minute and then the next minute, I was in a small locked crate and being sent to an unknown place being handled by unfamiliar faces. I had water and food in my crate but I was really scared. After arriving at the airport there was paperwork to be done and a few hours later, i was handed to a lady with American Airlines. I was given a final goodbye and sent of to an unknown destination and to people who I didn’t know. I can’t read but the sticker on my crate said CARGO! I may be a puppy but even I know, that I am not CARGO! I am a human!! Well, a dog. But still, I am way more human than most humans.  

The flight from Dallas to San Jose was long. Very long. I was annoyed and I must have annoyed many by my incessant barking but what could I do? I am a baby and I was scared and I had no idea where I was being sent and what was going to happen to me. Eventually, I fell asleep and was woken up by a loud thud. A few minutes later, I heard lots of commotion. Strange noises were coming from all over. I was tired and didn’t know what was going on. Then all of a sudden I saw light. My crate was removed from the dark cargo hold in the belly of the plate on to the tarmac. It seemed like a gorgeous sunny day in California? 

Another 30 to 40 minutes passed and I was brought to an office where two people were anxiously pacing the room. The lady who carried me in to the office told them that they had to show ID and sign paperwork. All of a sudden I see this really pretty face peering through the grill of my crate trying to catch my eye. All I could see were two strangers and they were as apprehensive as I was. They were your mom and dad and soon to be my mom and dad. 

It seemed like it took forever for the zip ties to be cut before the crate door could be opened. Your dad, was holding an iPhone and trying to record the entire episode. He thinks he is a millennial but he is really old and lame. Your mom though, she was all love! Within minutes, I was in her arms and she must have felt my heart beat, because it was racing. I had no clue or idea where I was or who was holding me. All I know is that it was gentle. 

The ride home from San Jose airport was short and I arrived at your house. I was greeted by a number of people when I arrived in Fremont. Everyone seemed so excited to see me but I was still not sure of what was happening. It was a big day for me and I was exhausted. Luckily I found two arms that were warm and welcoming. 

It was strange for me in many ways. Kathy, my breeder had given me a name. She called me Proud. My new parents were not sure what to call me. They debated for hours. They called me Sandy, then Duke, then Kershaw but finally settled on Rio. I like that name but somehow I get called Dodgy quite often and I wondered what or why that was. 

As days went by I found out that Dodgy was your nick name. You had lived in their home and their hearts for almost 14 years and after your passing they could not come to grips with getting another dog. On my first day, my mom was very distant with me. She held me and comforted me but it felt like she was not entirely comfortable with my presence. She was happy and she was sad. She was very conflicted but as days went by, I realized she felt that she was perhaps cheating on you. You were their dog for so many years and she loved you like no one else. Losing you has been hard on her but I want you to know that she still loves you and the way she treats me is a testament to that love. 

Your dad though, oh boy. Has he changed or has he changed? I am sure you can see from wherever you are that I get away with murder. Don’t be dismayed though. You may have gotten a rough deal with him but you paved the way for me. That’s why I am writing a thank you note to you Dodger. You taught my dad to love and nurture a dog. If it hadn’t been for you, he would have not known how to handle a puppy. He may still have a thing or two to learn but he does seem to be making significant progress. All dogs go to heaven. You did and you carved a place for me in the hearts of my parents. I miss my siblings and my family in Terrell but I think I can get used to this new place and the weather is nice as well. I am full of mischief but I hear that I am being signed up for some tutoring or at least that’s what it sounded like. 

They miss you dodgy, they still call me that at times but it doesn’t bother me because it comes from their heart and I know it is full of love for you. 

Rio

Dodger

Rio